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The Loss of a Buddy |
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There is a wealth of
information available to help people recover from the loss of a treasured
companion animal. There are even
groups where people can get together and share their pain with people who
feel similarly. The last thing someone
suffering the loss of a pet needs is to have someone say things such as: It was JUST a dog! Or, “Well, get another cat!” But, what about when a long
time buddy dies and the remaining dog or cat is grieving? There is almost no attention given to that
issue yet the suffering can be very evident.
One case I learned about as I was investigating the issue is that of a
Great Dane who simply lost the will to live.
No amount of effort could get the dog to eat and he lost 25
pounds! Finally he showed some healthy
responses when a pup was brought into the home. He never formed the same connection with
the newcomer but gained a reason to live.
Incidentally, that pup had to be a Great Dane! No other dogs fit the bill. One suggestion that
surfaced various times was to be certain to allow the remaining pet or pets
to check out the dead animal instead of them simply dealing with a
disappearance without warning. Cats and dogs often spend a great deal of time
searching for their missing friend. In some cases, when the dead companion was
buried on home ground the surviving pet spent a lot of time visiting the
site. There are also things that
may be helpful to the survivor. One
can give a flower essence treatment or use calming herbs such as valerian, skullcap,
passion flower or Siberian ginseng.* These are not be used indefinitely –
just as an aid for the early indications of grieving. Additional attention is valuable but use
caution to not overdue it and make the remaining dog or cat totally dependent
on the new showering of attention.
More problems may develop as the household returns to a more normal
feeling and the extra attention is withheld!
Often people do no realize that they are
giving so much attention to the survivor because THEY need the
comforting. Be aware of that problem. If there are various other
pets “misbehaving” could surface as the pack settles into a new ranking
structure. No punishing, please! There are other ways to deal with the
issues. Try to add some new
activity to the daily routine such as teach the dog (or cat!) some new
exercises or tricks. Change the route
you take for daily walks so there are new smells and fewer reminders of the
missing friend. Use caution when
considering adding a new pet to the household. Not all dogs or cats welcome newcomers and
the addition may result in stress rather than a new friendship. In fact, always use caution when adding a
new pet to the household! There are
recommended procedures and take the time to learn what they are to avoid
major upsets and even serious aggression in addition to stress for all
concerned. Take it seriously that your
furry buddy is suffering a loss and give attention to the situation. Of course, if they were not the best of
friends Patches may be ready to have a party now that he is front and center
and not having to deal with the newly departed whom he considered a very big
nuisance and an unnecessary competitor for your prized attention! Observe your pets. They’ll tell you just what you need to
know. *Natural is not a guarantee
of safety. Always learn about the
herbs you use and learn the proper way to use them. M |